A Word to the Wise

Jonny (age 3.5) just gave me an important warning. I don't know how important it could be since he used a fairly silly voice, but here goes:

"Dad, if you walk to work naked, the ArcGIS will start to get mad and tell all the workers!"

This is wrong on so many levels.

Going into business

James has tried a few get rich schemes. His latest involves what he refers to as J and J Transport. It is a service where he carries his customers on his back anywhere that they need to go. His rate: 2 cents per month. His service comes with a guarantee- if he drops you, he will give you 5 cents. Jonny was the first one to get his money in and has been enjoying piggy back rides off and on throughout the month. Amelia knows a good deal when she sees one. She prepaid for a year of J and J Transport.

Today, the kids decided to go into the restaurant business. Jimmy made up a menu. Amelia is the manager. Jimmy is the cook and waiter. Jonny is the janitor. I ordered "surprise entree" with a side of fruit and "swamp dessert"
Surprise turned out to be a ham sandwich. It was well made, with mustard and NO MAYONAISE, served with grapes on the side. I did not get so lucky with Swamp Dessert. It turned out to be half a cup of granulated sugar with globs of honey stirred in and a teaspoon of oats on top.
After trying to choke down a few bites, I came up with a scheme of my own. I asked if I could bake my Swamp Dessert. I got approval "as long as I did not add more than 4 tablespoons of extra ingredients." I stirred in a few of those cookie ingredients (you know- flour, vanilla, etc) and turned it into a cookie dough which I baked and called Baked Swamp Dessert. They were good. I could not talk the kids into trying them. I guess choking down some raw Swamp Dessert was enough for them.
If you would care to dine at the Kiddodiddo's Restaurant, please know that their rates are reasonable. If you are over 12 years, it's free. If you are under 3 it is free.

vocabulary building

Last week, we had a few dinner conversations that turned into vocabulary builders.
Gary was explaining a funny thought he had while driving home from work. It was about some duties he had to perform at church (where he used to be ward clerk.) He said something like this:
Some churches have layman clergy. But our church also has "lay accountants."
After he got through the explaining what a layman is, Jonny said, after a thoughtful pause: That is like Spiderman. He has a job, but he doesn't get paid to be Spiderman.

The second conversation began when Jonny was trying to tell us that he "go-ed" somewhere. Gary explained that he should say "went," because "goad" means to tease someone until you get a reaction.
A few days later, I was reprimanding Amelia for teasing her brother. She responded (in a rather lofty tone) "I don't tease. I goad."

How old are you?

Simon's birthday is coming up soon, so I thought it would be good to teach him to answer the typical little kid question, "How old are you?"
The conversation went like this:
Me: Simon, your birthday is coming. You are going to be 2. Can you say "I'm 2?"
Simon: no.
Me: You are one and you are going to be 2. Can you say almost 2? When I say How old are you, you say "almost 2" ok? Simon, how old are you?
Simon: How old you, Mommy?
Me: I am 30.
Simon: NO! You are 2!
Me: No, I am not 2, I am 30. How old are you?
Simon: Not quite 2.

Black Licorice and Handedness

A poll and discussion on a MyFamily site made me want to poll the general public on the following question:

The Short Sale Shimmy (Part 2)

< The Short Sale Shimmy (Part 1)

"Act now! For a limited time, you can double your salary and quintuple your rent in only six years! Call 1-800-GRAD-SCHOOL to find out how!"

Today we learned some not-so-good news about our future home. Three weeks ago, the seller's agent was preparing the short sale packet to give to the bank. The title company helped with some documents, including the HUD-1 form. The seller's agent noticed some errors on the HUD-1 and called the title company asking for corrections. They said that their person who normally does the HUD-1 was gone and whoever was filling in made the mistakes.

The next action that was taken was yesterday--three weeks later--when Tracy called our agent to see if there was any word. We were curious because our agent said the soonest we would possibly hear back was three weeks. It's a good thing Tracy followed up, because when our agent called the seller's agent, she realized that she had failed to follow up with the title company. So nothing has been done in three weeks, there is no correct HUD-1, and the bank has not even seen the short sale packet or our offer yet.

<cry type="anguished" gratuitous="true">
AAARRRGGGHHH!!!
</cry>

The good news is that the seller is still amenable to renting the house to us, so we will probably move in on or about September 22. I have no idea when we will finally own that house, but if Hope and Change solve this problem like they are solving the rest of our nation's problems...then I'm going to need a few refrigerator cartons to build our next house.

Movie Recommendation

While I have not actually sat through the entire movie Muppets in Space, I have it on good authority that it is really funny. Here's how I know.
Someone (who shall remain nameless) wet the bed twice in one week (highly unusual.) The reason, "I was lying in bed thinking about Muppets in Space. I was laughing so hard and then I was all wet."
SO go check out Muppets in Space, but make sure everyone is wearing Pull-Ups to bed for the next week, just in case.

Translation

We read the following verse 2 nights ago, while studying in the book of Daniel
Daniel 3:29
Therefore I make a decree, That every people, nation, and language, which speak any thing amiss against the God of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego, shall be cut in pieces, and their houses shall be made a dunghill: because there is no other God that can deliver after this sort.

James: Wait a minute. Did that just say their houses will be made into poo? They will be cut into pieces and their houses will be made into POOP?!

The kids are still laughing about that one.

I feel like Elmer Fudd

In the spring, I rented a garden plot and planted a few vegetables. (Well, I planted more than vegetables, but the ants kept eatting the seeds.)
This summer, it has been more than I can do to keep up with these plants. The zucchini provided more than 30 pounds of food, before dying while we were on vacation. The green beans produced over 15 lbs before finishing up. The peas were good too. Now all I've got left is a pumpkin plant and 3 productive tomato plants. Pounds of tomatoes. Unfortunately, they had a growth spurt while we were on vacation, just missing the tomato cages I set up. The look like huge overburdened spiders, with legs spread in every direction. Once, while the kids and I were walking up to our garden plot, we saw a cute little bunny bouncing out. It enjoyed many of the green beans. Now it is lunching on my tomatoes. Each one that reaches ripeness on the vine is covered in bunny bites. That rascally rabbit is ruining my crop! This bunny is patient. It won't settle for almost ripe. It waits until they reach perfection and then samples each one. It doesn't finish what it starts, so I am left with a bunch of inedible tomatoes. I picked a bunch of the almost ripe ones, in hopes they will ripen on the counter.

How do the kids feel about the garden? Well, there's a bunch of whining, but they have settled into jobs they like. James mans the hose, to water. Jonny takes the picked produce to Amelia, to guard (from Simon.) Amelia is the veggie guard and bathroom escort (she walks Jonny to the port o potty sometimes and takes it seriously.) Simon stumbles around alternately picking underripe vegetables and getting soaked with the hose. Gary, while not a kiddodiddo, has done his share of helping with the weeding and funding of the project.
Last time we went to the garden, Simon got excited and yelled "Garden! Garden! It's my favorite!" I was so happy to have someone to share my joy, not just tolerate it.

Chef's Surprise

Amelia had her friend Abbey over last week. Jimmy had a Dominic over too. (these are best friends from school.) While the boys pillow fought (for 2 hours straight) the girls decided to get creative in the kitchen. I tried to keep out of the way, but I could hear the discussion in the kitchen as Amelia and Abbey created their very own recipe. It had raw oats, brown sugar, granulated sugar and honey. They measured mixed and stirred for a very long time. Then they got spoons to eat their concoction. "This is disgusting!" Amelia cried. "Yeah- lets just eat the sugar off it," Abbey agreed.
Once the friends had left and things had calmed down, Jonathan and James wandered into the kitchen. There they found the 2 bowls filled with Amelia and Abbey's creation. There were two of them, so they sat down to eat it. They ate and ate and ate. "This is good" James said. "Mmm!" said Jonny appreciativly. They ate every last bite of it and wanted more.

Simon Talking about Games

Simon has many of what I would call Pandora's Boxes. These are places and compartments that we do not normally allow Simon to access. One of Simon's Pandora's Boxes is a cabinet full of games, most of which are for people older than 22 months and all of which are choking hazards with fragile boxes.

On Sunday after church, I unlocked and opened the game cabinet so the older kids could get out a game. Simon made a beeline for the cabinet, grabbed the Animal Crackers matching game, held it up, started parading around, and gleefully said one of his most coherent things yet: "It's my favorite! It's my favorite! I'll match tiger card!"

He's getting big fast, and he's very cute!

(By the way, don't worry about Simon eating Tums. Poison Control said that as a chemical, they're not harmful in the least. They could be a choking hazard though.)

Guessing Game

We had just come home from our vacation and had not unpacked the suitcases. I was making lunch in the kitchen when James ran to me yelling "Simon got the Tums!" So I ran to Simon, grabbed the Tums and cleaned out his mouth. It is to his credit that he did not protest when I stole his "treat." He knows Tums are a no-no.

So here's the guessing game: How many Tums fit in these sweet cheeks?

The Short Sale Shimmy (Part 1)

Ladies and gentlemen, we have an accord. Actually we have two. Tracy told you about one of them, in which we sell and move out of our 3-bedroom condo in late September. That contract appears to be rock solid, except that we goofed the closing date and need to do an addendum (note to self).

The new contract is to buy our next home, a 4-bedroom house a few miles northwest of our current home in a town where we used to live. It will be our first single-family detached home, garage, and private yard since we were kids. The house is fairly spacious, and the yard features some nice trees, a jacuzzi, a gazebo, and a hammock stand, but no hammock. The seller can use the hammock but wanted to leave the large lawn stuff behind. The neighborhood has little crime and good schools. The kids will still ride the bus to school for now.

Now the fun and adventurous part is that the house we're buying is a short sale, meaning the seller is asking the banks to accept less money than is actually owed, in order to avoid foreclosure. Therefore, even though we and the seller have signed a contract, it's really no good until the banks approve. That will probably take about a month, according to our agent. But our agent and the seller's agent think the offer is good and the banks will probably accept it. Plus, our agent says that the other agent is really good at pushing short sales through. We'll see. The real adventure will begin if one of the banks is not happy with the offer. We have options, none of which are good if the banks don't accept our offer. So it will take nerves of steel, as well as lots of Tums in my case.

You must be sick of that post about Amelia's broken arm...

but that's all you're going to see for awhile. Immediately after getting her cast, we left for California. Immediately on return from our trip we found a buyer for the Kiddodiddo Ranch (a 3 bedroom condo.) We are currently (frantically) looking for a house to move into before the start of school. So wish us luck! Maybe I'll be posting again soon- or maybe I'll catch you up on everything once this whole headache, I mean summer vacation is over.

Amelia's Arm Surgery

The surgery on Amelia's broken arm went well. It took longer than expected, because the break was complicated. There was just one break, but it was a curved break right above the elbow (see the x-ray from Tracy's earlier post). Moreover, the broken bone pieces were poking into the muscle, so that when the surgeon initially straightened it out yesterday, the muscle was pinched in there. No wonder Amelia had a very hard night of sleep.

Today the surgeon realized what had happened with the muscle, so he had to cut open the arm to sort everything out, which he was not expecting to do. We were told to expect one hour in the OR, which turned into three.

Now Amelia is asleep at home, still under the effects of the anesthesia. Tracy is out gathering medicines for when the anesthesia wears off.

Thanks very much to all well-wishers and especially to those families who have watched our boys today and yesterday while we have helped Amelia.

What Gary Didn't Tell You...

...is that the orthopedic surgeon asked if he could take home a copy of this x ray for his wife and kids who are begging him for a trampoline. AND that they don't give you a "mild scolding" when you say trampoline in the emergency room. They tell you "trampolines should be burned to the ground!"

On a more sentimental note, he also didn't tell you that this morning, Amelia woke up and said "I want to make everyone breakfast in bed, because they have been so nice to me." Even in her pain, she is grateful and she is thinking of others. (No, I didn't let her make breakfast in bed for the family. She can barely move.)

Pray for Amelia

Please pray for our little Amelia. She broke her arm in a trampoline accident yesterday. It's a 100% break of the humerus right above the elbow. She was and still is in a lot of pain. I am awake at this hour because Tracy and I just gave her a round of pain medicine.

Later this morning she will undergo surgery to put pins in her arm to help it heal properly. They were unable to schedule it yesterday. They were quite busy at the hospital with similar injuries from the first day of summer break...er, summer vacation.

Even though it's a bad 100% break (x-rays coming soon), at least it's a fairly clean break. The surgeon said he doesn't anticipate any complications, permanent effects, or healing time beyond four weeks.

If you ever have your child seen by an orthopedic surgeon and staff for a trampoline accident, you will endure mild scolding from each staff member and from the surgeon himself (or herself, but in this case himself). They are anti-trampolines, which is charitable of them given the business they get from trampoline victims.

Finally, yes, when Amelia is more cheerful later today or tomorrow, we will take her picture together with Simon, who gets his arm cast off on Thursday. :-)

Talky Baby

Simon is really talking a lot now. He is putting two or three words together frequently. But he really surprised me a few days ago with his longest sort-of-complete sentence I have heard yet, when cheerfully asking for one of his favorite delicacies:

"How 'bout that soymilk!"

Keep in mind that Simon is not yet two years old, so that's pretty remarkable in my opinion. Also, Simon is lactose-intolerant, so he's our only soymilk consumer.

I was trying to decide whether Simon had put together a sentence of four words or five. The brand we use calls it soymilk. But there are more than twice as many references on the Web to soy milk than to soymilk. So what say you?



UPDATE: it looks like Silk only uses soymilk when referring to Silk Soymilk, their capitalized brand. When they talk about soy milk without mentioning the brand, they do say "soy milk." I'm not saying they're right or wrong--because it appears that no matter how you answer the poll, they're both right and wrong!

Cidade Maravilhosa

In April I was fortunate enough to return to Brazil for the first time since my mission. I went to a trade show in Rio de Janeiro, also known in Brazil as "A Cidade Maravilhosa," the Marvelous City. Besides answering questions at our booth, I had time to see the city and take some photos with a super lo-fi camera phone.


Rio is very different from the parts of Brazil I lived in--Manaus, Rio Branco, Porto Velho--but I have a feeling that 11 years have made a lot of differences as well. It seemed so clean and prosperous, as compared to what I experienced in the North.

It also seemed a lot safer than I anticipated. The only Brazilian who I talk to on a regular basis nowadays gave me a Rio safety tip: "Never ever go to Copacabana Beach!" Good advice, except that that's where my hotel was. However, I did not feel threatened at all. I did use my money belt, I avoided going out after dark, and I looked over my shoulder frequently. And it was worth the trouble.



These photos are an insult to how beautiful Copacabana is. The beach, the water, the mountains, the buildings, and the people all make it a wonderful experience.


Of course, Copacabana is more than a beach. It is also a neighborhood, maybe not the fanciest in Rio, but decent, busy, and a nice place to be. The photo above is a nice little corner store near the hotel that had great deals on bottled water, cookies, drinkable yogurt, and other Brazilian staples. (Most of the time I did not drink bottled water. The hotel and conference center were modern enough that the tap water was fine.)


I stayed at the Pestana Rio Atlântica, which I can highly recommend. The room was not fancy but adequate and had air conditioning. And the view from the rooftop pool is incredible. Unfortunately my room faced the city instead of the beach...you have to pay more than my employer pays in order to get an oceanside room. If you prefer a purely American hotel, there's a Marriott down the street.

But any decent hotel in Copacabana will have English speakers, which I did not really need. My Portuguese was pretty rusty on the first day, but I caught on and did pretty well for the rest of the week. I'm nowhere near as good as when I lived in Brazil, but I can get by with relative ease to get around town. Brazilians seem to appreciate the effort to speak their language, and they are typically patient and willing to speak slowly as needed. Now, dealing with technical language at the trade show was a different story. That was very difficult for me, but fortunately we had a Brazilian at our booth as our go-to guy and me as an able backup, with our two gringos on Alert 5. (One of our "gringos" is actually less gringo than me, having spent half his life in Latin America. But Spanish is of little use in Brazil.)

After the trade show ended on Friday, my flight did not leave until Saturday evening, so I had most of the day Saturday to see the city. I saved some money and had a different experience by taking the subway and bus instead of taxis that day, and it seemed very safe during daylight hours.


There is a little train that you can ride to the top of Corcovado, the mountain that is the home of O Cristo Redentor--Christ the Redeemer. The train ride itself is fairly scenic as it winds through the Atlantic tropical forest and up the mountain more than 2000 feet high:


At the top is the statue of the Savior:


This was an inspiring moment for me. After being away from my family for a week, this was a good spiritual boost to have a very large reminder of our Savior and all he has done for me. I have read that many people see this statue and think "Welcome." In this place, in this land where I was one of His representatives for a couple of years, the impression I got from the statue looking down at me was "Come Unto Me."

The statue sits on top of a pedestal that has a little chapel inside. I thought the trilingual signs saying "no photos of the inside of the chapel please" were sufficient, but most people did not. The Christ has the marks in his hands and feet. He also has a little heart carved on his robes, which I guess must be a Catholic thing.

The view from the top is wonderful:

This photo is to the east. In the distance is Pão de Açúcar (Sugarloaf Mountain).

This photo is to the southeast. Beyond the little mountains is Copacabana Beach, where my hotel was.

This photo is to the south. To the west of Copacabana is a lagoon and Ipanema Beach.

This is to the south as well and proves that I was there.

I also took photos of Maracaná, the world's most famous soccer stadium, but it was cloudy that way and the photos on my lo-fi loaner phone did not turn out.

I took the train back down the mountain and took a bus back to Largo do Machado, where there is a nice square:


Largo do Machado also has a subway station, and I took the subway and another bus to arrive at O Pão de Açúcar--Sugarloaf Mountain. I took the Bondinho (tram) to the top of Morro da Urca and then to the top of the Sugarloaf, 1300 feet high, where the view is stunning. The view from the Morro da Urca isn't bad either:

That's Botafogo Beach, to the northwest, as well as a helipad.

This is looking down one side of the Morro da Urca. The white spot on the side of the hill is a rock climber.

Then I took tram #2 to the top of the Sugarloaf:

In this one, you can see the Cristo Redentor in the upper right portion of the photo.

There's Copacabana Beach.

The Pão de Açúcar has some nice walking trails with beautiful vegetation and lots of shade. I took advantage of some peace and quiet, and I even found places on the trails where I could neither see nor hear anyone else. It was very nice.

Soon it was time to take the trams down and go pick up my stuff at the hotel in Copacabana and then go to the airport, for the short flight to São Paulo and then the long flight home. What a nice week this was, but how wonderful to return to my family.

What else...the heavy traffic surprised me. They have a real traffic problem in Rio (worse than here by far) and the subway is not extensive enough. If you go to a convention at Riocentro, realize that it is a long taxi ride from Copacabana, so plan for an hour or more to be safe. And it will set you back R$77 (about $35) for a fixed-price taxi, R$50-60 for a yellow taxi...There are lots of good restaurants in Copacabana, and many of them have all kinds of delicious food and menus many pages long. There wasn't a ton of Brazilian food in that area, but there was a good churrascaria and an Amazonian restaurant with weird food unlike anything I saw in Amazônia...Most places take Visa and Mastercard. I tried lots of ATMs before I found one that would take my Visa debit card. The one that worked was a Citibank ATM...AAA in the U.S. is a great place to get an inconspicuous money belt. You don't have to be a member, but you get a discount if you are...That's all the random tidbits I have.

I had a great time in Rio de Janeiro, and I'd like to go back again someday.

James

So what is Jimmy up to, you might ask. Rightly so. He does not appear on the kiddodiddo site so frequently as his siblings. He's not as outrageous, so he's not a headline maker. Looking over the last several posts, I realized something was missing: Jimmy's baptism (or more correctly: James's baptism)

It hurts to type it. He has always been Jimmy. Since the day he was born. I don't think I ever called him James in the hospital or anytime since. It feels foreign to call him James, but he insists. Or rather he is more polite about it and is very grateful if you remember "James."

James was baptized in March. It was a special occasion. He asked Gary and me to speak, about Baptism and The Holy Ghost. I was so surprised he invited us because he hears so much from us already. But it was his special day and I wanted to make sure the baptism program went the way he wanted it to. We sang:

"I like my birthdays every one, each brings a special joy to me but I can't wait until I'm eight for then I'll be baptized you see.

To be baptized as Jesus was by one who holds the priesthood true and thus obey God's holy laws is just the thing I want to do.

When hands are placed upon my head then I'll receive the Holy Ghost and if I listen carefully, I 'll have the blessing I need most."

and then he was baptized by his father. I am so proud of James and his decision to be baptized.

Many thanks to all who came to make it a special day for our family. (Don't you love all the bunny ears in this shot?!)